Preface: My "family of origin" includes one Mother named "Mom", one father named "The Dick", one sister named Becky, one brother named Mark and one me named Xtine.
Last weekend, Taylor and I got together with my mom, Mom, for brunch. Mom told me this: "Your father bought four spots in Paradise."
Mental calculation: Mom, him, Becky, Mark. No spot for me?
Ok, this is no surprise. The Dick has written me off for having the nerve to not be a right wing republican, among a few other, minor (heh heh) infractions. But you didn't know he could ace me out of Paradise, did you?
Well, it turns out that Paradise is in Pennsylvania. Really! In the Alabama section, according to James Carville, who says that PA is just Philadelphia and Pittsburgh with Alabama in between. My father grew up in Paradise (this defies explanation), where his father was a preacher at a presbyterian church. His parents are buried in the cemetary there. That's the point, to spend eternity in Paradise. The Dick and the rest of the clan (the GOOD ones) will spend eternity there too. I said to Mom: "Don't worry about me. I have more friends in that other place anyway." Mom just looked exasperated.
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Not being one to leave a stone unturned, I was curious to figure out exactly where I might find Paradise. It's in the vicinity of other such richly named towns as Mascot, Hatville, and Bird in Hand.
Most interesting of all, it's not far from Intercourse. Insert joke here.
e.g. "Intercourse, the town for people who got screwed on their way to Paradise."
e.g. "Intercourse, founded c. 4000 B.C.E., town founders: Adam & Eve (after being kicked out of Paradise).
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